Tuesday, December 9, 2008

A Love Supreme

What is your idea of a good/great relationship? Is it one in which both partners contribute to the entity of the relationship? Is it one in which one partner makes the majority of decisions? Tell me your ideas for a good/great relationship.

A few years ago, I heard the title of a jazz album that stirred my curiosity. The album was called A Love Supreme. It's by John Coltrane, a saxophonist from the 1960s. Now I've never heard any songs from the album. It was the album title itself that got me. I was curious as to what a Love Supreme would be.

There's no official description of it. It's an album title made up by a jazz artist. But I have my interpretation of what it could mean. The few people that heard my interpretation balked at me as if that was the most ridiculous thing they'd ever heard. Regardless of what other people say, I think a Love Supreme is possible. Here's my interpretation.

A Love Supreme would be a relationship in which you can:

See and be seen,
Hear and be heard,
Know and be known,
Love and be loved.
This aspect of the relationship allows you to see the other person for who they really are. They are also able to see you for who you really are. You can see their inner beauty, kindness, and heart, and they'll see yours.
This aspect of the relationship allows you to hear what the other person is really saying. They are also able to hear what you say. For example, if you're arguing about one partner spending too much time away, you'll know that maybe what they're really saying is that they feel neglected.
This aspect of the relationship allows you to know the other person. You'll know their likes and dislikes and possible reactions to given situations. They'll know the same about you. You'll know these things about each other because you've communicated and stated your boundaries.
This aspect of the relationship allows you to love the person with all their faults. Nobody is perfect, so you accept their shortcomings, and they do the same for you. And you both love each other anyway, in spite of it all.
Please know that I'm not talking about the physical sense of seeing with eyes or hearing with ears. I'm talking beyond that. For example, one of my friends was told that she was beautiful on the outside as well as the inside. She was seen.
Now we know that relationships aren't easy, and that they take a lot of work from both partners. There will be disagreements, and you may not get along everyday. But I think that when you have these see, hear, know, and love ingredients, the relationship recipe will come out right. And that's when you have your Love Supreme...
Please know that I don't like these paragraphs squished together like this! The blog is doing this.

No comments: